Hypocrisy, Birthday Parties, and The people that we keep.

"If it were not for the intellectual snobs who pay, the arts would perish with their starving practitioners - let us thank heaven for hypocrisy." ~ Aldous Leonard Huxley

As you start to read this blog, I want you to think of everyone you consider a friend, doesn't matter if they are a close friend or not, I just want you to think of all the people that you give that title to. Earlier this week I had a fit, a full-blown, huge, massive, hard-hitting, pissed off fit. Over something I, myself, wouldn't be able to do. And that is have an open invitation, to everything I do, to all of my friends. So, I called a good friend of mine today, because I was upset that I wasn't invited to something she was invited to, in fact I was house-sitting at the person's house who had the party. I was pissed, more than that, I was jealous. Even though that is hard for me to admit to. And through talking to her, I found out more information about the party and we figured out that we do the exact same thing to the party thrower and her crew. So, Why could I be pissed? Truth of the matter is, I couldn't. And, I stopped being so mad. I have my groups of friends, as I am sure you do. And my groups of friends are as such: My Theatre Friends My Fort Wayne Friends My D&D Group My Glee Gang The Goshen Group The BD's Crew Now , When I get with these groups of people, I know exactly how things are gonna run, I know the atmosphere of the group, I know what I can and cannot do. I am familiar with the working and the dealings with the people in each of these groups and I change myself, slightly, in accordance to these people. I would never ask a friend from the D&D Group to join the Glee Gang, it might not work, he/she might have a good time. But, then I would be forcing the other members of the group to adjust to the new person, and that isn't always fair. As you continue to read this blog, I want you to think of all of the activities that you like to do with your various friends. I don't care if it something like going out to a certain place to eat, or watch a show, or whatever you do with your friends. The reason why I brought this up, is that I found out through my smart friend, that the group that had the 4th of July party has been doing this for years, they didn't intend for it to be a click but, I don't every really think that we ever intend on forming clicks. But, who do I think I am, to force them to change their festivities to include me. And the only reason my friend got to go this year is one, she is the roommate to the one throwing the party, two, they (party thrower and my friend) wanted me to have the house to myself, and three, it was last minute, she was supposed to be out of town all weekend. This is information, that I didn't know. Oops. My bad. It is amazing that when I found out that I too was guilty of the very thing I was upset over, it hurt washed away. I am glad that the hurt washed away. I wish I would have had the information sooner. It would have made my friend's birthday party alot easier to go to... My fantastic friend had her 30th birthday party, and truth be told, I didn't want to go. I knew that I would come face to face with the people I was pissed at. But, I am a friend and I would gladly suffer for a friend and if I can dish it out, I can take it. I went to the party expecting to be bombarded with problems and drama. And, Then I quickly forced myself to realize that... it wasn't about me, it was my friend's party, get over yourself. Still expecting drama, I stayed quiet for a bit, which for me is hard, and had light conversation with people that weren't apart of the bastards that didn't invite me. (I say that part jokingly now) , and ended up having a good time. Pictures were taken and a good time was had by all celebrating the life of our friend. Funny thing about pictures, they always get seen. The photos from the party ended up on Facebook, and other friends of mine, who agreed with me on my last blogs and were sick of the clicks, saw the pictures and saw me in them, and called me out calling me a hypocrite. The word stung. A Hypocrite isn't a nice thing to call anyone, let alone a friend. But, in a way he was right. but, I would gladly suffer for a friend. I would take the slings and arrows to be by a friends side, and doubly so on the person's birthday. I would rather be called a hypocrite, than be called a bad friend. I would rather be called a hypocrite, than have that person tell me that they wanted me to be by their side on their special day and have them be hurt because I was absent. As you finish reading my blog, I want you to think of all of those people, at all of those activities at the same time, all of the time. Not a pretty picture is it? And I am guilty of trying to force that kind of thing. As much as I would like to have all of my friends together to make things easier for myself. In actuality, it just wouldn't work, the size, the personalities, the fact that I would go crazy trying to make sure that all of my friends were doing well, having a good time. That is why when my birthday rolls around, I end up having three to four parties. it just doesn't work. I don't think people form clicks on purpose, they just kinda happen out of comfort, and we as humans love to be comfortable. "There is no feeling more comforting and consoling than being right next to the one you love" ~Unknown